Learning to Let Go of Anger, Control, and Resentment
How do you let go of control, anger, and resentment?
I had to learn this recently.
The men in my family gathered in a provincial park over the weekend to spend some time together. We did this in large part to honour my mother, who passed away earlier this year.
A lot has changed for me over the years. As a father, I have had to wrestle with my selfishness and learn how to overcome it. I’m still learning this, in a lot of ways.
But on this trip, I also had to come face-to-face with my own propensity to go camping my way.
- I became annoyed with the loud generators and heating systems of some of the big campers around us
- I was bothered by campers that left lights on overnight
- I didn’t like all the noise I could hear from other sites
But I sat back and realized that no one else in my family seemed to be bothered by it.
On Saturday, we took a series of long hikes. These hikes gave me a lot of time to think.
On the hikes, I realized…
- That my default mode seems to be to respond to something I don’t like with anger, and then to resent those around me who aren’t also angry, because I feel shame for my own response
- That this isn’t healthy, by any means
So when we got back to the camp site for the night, I took a short walk up to an unused site where I could access the river.
I picked up a handful of loose dirt to use as a symbol. Looking out over the river, I let the dirt fall through my fingers and I released my anger, control, and resentment…
…for the moment. I know this will be a work in progress. But in that moment, I was free.
If you struggle with negativity, bad thought patterns, and poor habits, you are not alone!
Most often, you just need someone to talk with, who will help you think through these things, and help you learn why you snap to these as your first reaction.
I’d love to help you. I help people find balance in their life and work. Balance comes when you understand yourself and practice good self-care habits.